You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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