You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
