Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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