this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Hippo gnu deer
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize