Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Randomize
