its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Randomize
