can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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