It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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