So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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