ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize
