I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
