Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
