Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Randomize
