like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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