you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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