I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
