i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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