Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize