Hey man sorry I got all grabby
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
