I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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