Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
