And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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