hotel room ftw
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize
