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Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Randomize
