I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Randomize
