weddingsv make me drug and hornr
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Enjoy the penises
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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