i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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