there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
