didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
