so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Randomize
