He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
