I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Randomize
