Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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