If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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