Soap is not a condiment
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Every concussion has its silver lining
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Randomize
