Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize