I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
