kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
