don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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