That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
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