IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
