I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize