Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Swine flu is the new snow day.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
