I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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