I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
