Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
