i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
