Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
