that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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