The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
